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Online Dating: Casanova's Disappearing Act

Though we didn't meet online, Casanova seems to be the kickoff of my crazy dating scene.

Happy Valentine's Day to all my fellow singles. I figured I would share with you a story about what I thought was a love affair in the making. I was freshly out of a long-term relationship, and naive with the thought that something Earth-shattering was around the corner. In the midst of this romanticly charged holiday, I figured I would try and soothe my single status by posting a blog. Enjoy.

This next story spans over a month. I’ve tried to compact it as best I could. Also, this is not a tale from the Internet, but my first real-life encounter after my newly acquired singleness.

In my last post I had a very valid (in my mind) question. Why is it that people go out of their way to say they are going to do something and then NOTHING? I’ve had my fair share of this phenomenon lately, and it all started with Casanova.

Casanova started off really subtle. Nice comments, compliments, smiles from across the room. I figured he was just a nice guy, and didn’t think too much of it. Then the conversations started and I found out some interesting things about him. He’s traveled around the world. Speaks four languages. Owns his own home, and is co-owner of a bar. Pretty much has his stuff together. You had me at “traveled.” I have always been in awe of people who can master another language, so this is where this torrid affair begins.

I see Casanova at a meeting somewhere and talks me up. At the end of the meeting, he calls me over and asks me what I’m doing later that night. He gives me his phone number, and tells me that he wants to get together before he goes to work at the bar. Interesting. I tell him I had plans with a co-worker for drinks, and he says he’ll meet us there.

We meet up. Things couldn’t go better. There are hugs, storytelling, laughter, smiles, and that one part where he invites me to go to Italy with him. You know, the usual. (He was going to France for work, and after the job was done he was going to stay in Europe after to visit some family in Italy. Told me I could stay with him, everything would be taken care of, the WORKS). Things were going swimmingly - he apologized about the short meeting, but he had to go to work. He invited us to come over, said that he wanted to continue his conversation with me. We all get up to leave, when he hugs me, and asks again if I’m going to come to his bar to hang out with him.

My friend and I go to his bar. He buys us drinks, we chat, having a good time. Upon leaving, he gives me another hug and tells me to text him when I get home so he knows I made it home safe. At this point I’m swooning. Or drooling. Can’t remember, but I was on cloud nine.

We text back and forth over the next few days. I invite him to my sister’s volleyball game. Don’t hear anything back. He text-messages me on Friday - says that he was working on the garage at his rental property and didn’t get my message. He’s bummed because he wants to see me, so he asks if we can re-schedule for next Tuesday. When I tell him that would work, he then invites me out for Saturday night - says he’s going to be up at the bar, but not working, and that I should come up to see him.

Saturday rolls around, we’re texting throughout the day. I get dolled up, and head out on the town. I meet up with some of my friends and I hang with them until about midnight, because Casanova said he’d be at the bar from midnight until 2 a.m. I leave to go to his bar, and I text him when I get there… no response. I walk into the bar and can’t see him. I mosey up to the bouncer and ask for him. Bouncer tells me it’s his night off, and he hasn’t been in at all. Interesting. I go outside and call Casanova. No answer. I leave a semi-playful voicemail about being stood up, and that I’ll stick around for five minutes and then I’m out. I end up leaving, and don’t hear from him again that whole weekend. Tuesday rolls around - the day he said he wanted to see me. At this point, with no contact in three days, I’m not entirely hopeful. The day/night passes without contact and I’m not surprised. Angered, but not surprised. I had given him the benefit of the doubt, and that bit me in the butt. A few days later he messages me on Facebook. Says he really needs to talk to me, and he’ll call me the next day at 5 p.m. when I get out of work (he claims he was working at that point in time). Shocker, I never get a call.

And I never got a call/text from him again. Though I heard through a friend that he was contemplating NOT taking the job in France because he had a new woman in his life. Huh. I’m assuming he was playing both of us at the same time, and the other girl won out. Instead of being decent and telling me what was up, I got dropped like a hot potato.

I saw Casanova once after that. He was talking to a friend of mine when I strolled through the door. He heard my voice, and came over to me. He said hello, I returned the greeting, then just looked at him. He looked like he wanted to say something, but hesitated. Another friend asked him if he was excited about France, and he said he was. One last forlorn look at me, and then he left. That’s the last I ever saw/heard of Casanova.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

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